Diddling Dandy

Ho hum. This AL Easter beats the beginning of the season baseball doldrums by making certain that he has definite oral pleasure lined up for after the game...

Nothing new, sure, but this cutie takes it step further by having his secret sweetie memorize his game schedule so that as soon as the game is over...like clockwork, she should be ready and willing to expect that knock knock knock on her door. Approximately ten minutes later, she bids him adieu and he's out and feeling much better about his team losing a game, or six...or seven...

According to the sweetheart...it may be only ten minutes, but they get muuuuch further than second base.

Mirror, Mirror On The Wall- Who's The Fairest Of Them All?

Which up and coming AL flamethrower apparently enjoys the sight of his own reflection especially in the bedroom? Rumor has it that he likes to position mirrors around his bed in order to view he and his female friends from a variety of different angles. He also spends a good deal of time primping for each of his encounters by obsessively brushing his teeth, putting on cologne, and checking his hair. He has even been known to leave his ladies waiting while he strikes a variety of muscle flexing poses in front of his beloved mirror.

Brokeback Dugout

Which American Leaguer, not known for his stadium-side manner, may have taken to spreading lies about his own teammates out of jealousy? And it’s not the kind of jealousy you’re thinking of…

Stories have long been circulating about his bad behavior toward fans, primarily female fans. There was the time he made a girl cry outside the team bus. Then there was the time he promised tickets to a security guard in exchange for driving his car from spring training to his team’s city, then reneged on the passes, leaving a teammate to step up to the plate.

But last season, this infielder’s asshole tendencies may have made their way back to the clubhouse, when rumors began to surface about two more genetically gifted players and their allegedly too-close-for-comfort bond. Truth? Nah…just wishful thinking. He certainly does seem to hate women, and those other two guys are rather foxy…

Put it this way: That’s not premature hair loss, that’s just karma.

The Powder Diet

Which National Leaguer began to worry his former teammates by his constant late night outings and extra-curricular activities, which allegedly included heavy drinking, numerous encounters with barely legal ladies and an affinity for cocaine? His penchant for the powder may be the culprit behind his horrid spring training as well as his recent weight loss and marital problems.

Southern Side-Dish

Which very married NL East outfielder is having an illicit affair with a very married woman??

Not only has he showered her with pricey gifts and shopping sprees, but he even invited his sexy 'Mrs.'tress to Spring Training...where HER game seats were a mere four seats removed from the wifey's...

From what I hear...in the almost two months since they first met, things are still as hot as Georgia asphalt.